Up on the A-Frame

by Jo Ann Mather

Up on the A-frame, scrambling claws
Down through the yellow with all four paws.
Out through the tunnel with lots of noise.
That's just some of agility's joys.

Chorus:
Oh, ho, ho. Who wouldn't know.
Oh, ho, ho. Who wouldn't go.
Over the Dogwalk, Up on the Frame
That's how you play the Agility Game!

First there's a jump, then a chute that's blue.
A right to the teeter and "tip it" too.
Over the broad jump, must clear it clean.
Can't help but worry, my dog's so green.

(Chorus)

Next it's the table, oh, it's a "down"
Stay till you're call now, don't be a clown.
Over the dogwalk at a breakneck pace.
Run to the yellow, wow, what a race!

(Chorus)

Left to the triple and a right to the tire!
My dog is flying like a house afire!
Another tunnel, take a shortcut there.
I do need a chance to get some air!

(Chorus)

Weave poles and then three more jumps to do.
If we keep on this like we're sure to get the blue!
Wow, that's our title with a perfect run!
I didn't know anything could be such fun!

(Chorus)

Coco's Lament

by Robin Cohen and Robin Kletke

There was a young Afghan named Coco
Who some thought was just a bit loco.
He's not though, you know.
But likes you to think so.
Sadly though his mind was simply a no-show.

This strong virile Afghan is hairier
Than most other hounds you may know.
And his nose goes to ground like a terrier
When he works the agility show.
His tricks leave observers much merrier
But his qualifying legs never grow.

A the recent OKC agility trial.
He really went more than the extra mile.
He rooted about like a besotted lout.
As his nose hit the dirt, dry dust entered his mouth.
Which had curved in a wry Afghan smile.

His grooming at first was impeccable.
But he knew that his fans wanted spectacle.
So he rolled in the dust as he sometimes just must.

His fine coat was soiled. His owners recoiled.
His trainer still toiled, but all efforts were foiled.
The crowd loved the show ­ he's an Afghan, you know.

Merry Agilitymas

by Jo Ann Mather

'Twas some time before Christmas
And out on the course
The agility folks
Had all gathered in force.

There were Shelties and Shepherds
And Terriers, too.
Border Collies and mixed breeds
To name just a few.

From the A-frame, the Corgis
Looked down from afar
After stringing the lights up
And placing the star

They were hanging the tinsel
On the dogwalk with care
By the snow-covered tunnel
Glistening in the cold air

Some thought about hanging
The chute as a stocking.
That's too greedy, said others
At that thought they were balking

The handlers were huddled
Up close to the heat
Thinking fondly of Springtime
And of the next meet.

They thought of the Summer
Of green grass and blue skies
While visions of blue rosettes
Danced in their eyes

They were dreaming of glory
Of trophies and fame
Of winning the National
The top of the game.

And away toward the back
Past three jumps and the tire
On the Pause Table,
Gifts were piled higher and higher

There was mini-equipment
Books and videos, too.
There were sweatshirts and t-shirts
Some red and some blue

There were brushes and flexis
A new collar and ball.
There were milk-bones and chewies
For one and for all.

While the dogs sat and marvelled
For all of them knew
That Santa Claus comes
For his canine friends, too.

So whatever your dog
Be it Herding or Hound.
Merry Christmas to all,
And to all a Clear Round.

Down by the Dogwalk

by Jo Ann Mather

When the weekend comes
When it's a Sunday or a Saturday
To the Fairgrounds we run
Just to give our dogs a chance to play
Down by the dogwalk
That's where we'll be
Where the handlers and the doggies all do
Agility!

(Chorus)
Down by the dogwalk
That's the course that we run.
Down by the dogwalk
We'll be having some fun
Down by the dogwalk
Through the tunnel we go
Down by the dogwalk
Wish we weren't quite so slow
Down by the dogwalk.
Dogwalk!

Let's do the weave pole dance
That's how we move our partners down the line
Come see us weave and prance
It's choreography so divine.
Down by the dogwalk
That's where we'll be
Where the handlers and the doggies all do
Agility!

To get those contact zones
We beg and plead and cry
And click and treat
Is it too much to ask to hit the yellow
With one of your feet?
Down by the dogwalk
That's where we'll be
Where the handlers and the doggies all do
Agility!

And when the day is done
We pack the car and hit the dusty trail
You know we sure had fun
And we'll be back no matter if we pass or fail!
Down by the dogwalk
That's where we'll be
Where the handlers and the doggies all do
Agility!

All I Want for Christmas
Or The Corgi's Lament

by Jo Ann Mather

(Sung to the tune of "All I want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth")

Chorus:
All I want for Christmas is a tail and legs.
A tail and legs, a tail and legs.
All I want for Christmas is a tail and legs.
Then I would have a Merry Christmas.

When I see Shelties wag their tails
I really, really wish that I could do that
A fluffy tail that I could wave
Instead of now I have to wag my whole butt!

(Chorus)

I'm just so short I get stepped on
By Aussies and by big old Border collies
With longer legs I too could run
And chase those sheep, yes, air by golly!

(Chorus)

With nice big ears that stick right up
I hear most everything that seems to go on
But with no tail, it's just not right
I surely wish that I could get one!

(Chorus)

For Christmas comes but once a year
It's only just a few more days to wait now
With legs and tail I'd have the edge
On Britches and on bossy Sister Kate, now!

(Chorus)